Online Therapy Session

I was in the process of writing up a blog of me ranting, complaining, and generally just getting some shit off my chest. Half way through I lost steam; just didn't seem to care to finish it. That seems to be my mood as of late. I don't know if it's because right I know I just don't seem to give a damn or if I'm just in some kind of funk. Most of the time I'm a very happy upbeat kind of guy who you will rarely ever find in a bad mood but for some reason I've been finding myself irritated or annoyed or just in a bad mood in the last few weeks.

Maybe it's money. I don't seem to be managing my finances very well anymore. Every dollar I make seems to go to somebody else's pocket and I've still got bills I'm behind on. And don't even get me started on the food situation. I opened my fridge and it was looking a little bare. Bologna and hot dogs, that's about it. Oh, and lots of condiments.

Maybe it's my job. I, for the most part, love my job but I seemed the most annoyed or foul tempered when I'm here. There seems to be certain people I work with that just straight piss me off and my patience is wearing thin and trust me I am a very, very patient person.

I own my own home (big reason I have no money!). I love living on my own and I feel very lucky that I can say that at twenty-four years old I am a homeowner. Here lately I can't stand being in my house. It has a very empty feeling even though I have four cats and three dogs that fill it up and my girlfriend is over there pretty often. I just don't seem to like being there by myself which used to be one of my favorite things. I loved having the down time to do what I wanted to do and I loved being able to completely stretch out in my bed.

I'm missing my girlfriend a lot lately which is weird because we work together so I see her all the time. We do work different rotations so we never get a night off together unless one of us takes a vacation day. Also, she's been spending a lot more time out at her parents' place lately because she's got even less money than I do since she had to pay her tuition and buy books for this semester. Where I live is about a good thirty minute drive from where she lives and neither one of us really has the money to spend in gas driving back and forth. So really the only time we actually get to spend together is at work, with two other people, most of the time in opposite corners of the room, so we don't get much time for just us. But it's just the way things are right now until one of us actually has money! Come on Powerball!!!


It's not like I don't have anything going for me. I'm going through the application process with my city's fire department and things seem to be going pretty good with it so far. Me and Heather ( my girlfriend just in case you were wondering ) are set to take a trip to Massachusetts ( where I get to see my first Red Sox game at Fenway! ) and hopefully Maine in April. It'll be two weeks that we get to spend together just us and I'm sure by the end she'll be ready to kill me lol! My brother is getting married in July, in Chicago and I'm the best man. I don't know what my deal is right now. Maybe it's just the dark, cold, grey winter months...

Actually, it sounds like I was able to get some shit off my chest afterall!